Playing Both Sides
In BDSM terms, I am a switch. Almost a "true switch," in fact, meaning that I take equal enjoyment from both Dominating and submitting. Deep down though, I prefer being submissive and am more turned on by the loss of control than the command of it. If I had to choose only one role for the rest of my life, it would definitely be submissiveness. In either role, the emotional connection and mental aspect of the power exchange is what's most important to me.
For a long time, my main interest in submitting was mainly behaviorial and mental D/s and your basic rough sex. With time and opportunity, I've developed a greater enjoyment of bondage and masochism. In fact, I haven't yet found a Dom who would/could hurt me as much as I'd like. I need to find a Dominant Sadist who'll hurt me to the point (and beyond) of tears. I really want to explore my pain limits, and would even be willing to try play peircing, cutting, and branding (someday, in a committed, monogamous relationship; it's not smart to let blood fly around in a casual encounter).
Understanding my subself is what makes me a good Dominant (which is more about attitude and demeanor than the toys): I have been in that submissive position, gone through those same tortures, and so can empathize with and better appreciate what my submissive partner is experiencing.
As a Dominant (or Domme), I'm a sadist. Almost more than anything else, I enjoy inflicting pain on a masochist sub, watching them endure and suffer in their eagerness to please and knowing that it is cathartic for them. Whimpers, grunts, and hisses from the pain are aphrodisiacs to me. Is really is a high to have so much control over a person, to have them trust me so much they'd allow me to restrain them and hurt him, that they'd literally put their body in my hands. How could I not care about and appreciate someone (especially a man) brave enough to be powerless to me? How could I not take care of them? So mixed in with the infliction of pain are reassuring words, tender touches and kisses. I've been told that I'm "merciless but not cruel," and it's obvious that I care. It shouldn't be any other way.
For a long time, my main interest in submitting was mainly behaviorial and mental D/s and your basic rough sex. With time and opportunity, I've developed a greater enjoyment of bondage and masochism. In fact, I haven't yet found a Dom who would/could hurt me as much as I'd like. I need to find a Dominant Sadist who'll hurt me to the point (and beyond) of tears. I really want to explore my pain limits, and would even be willing to try play peircing, cutting, and branding (someday, in a committed, monogamous relationship; it's not smart to let blood fly around in a casual encounter).
Understanding my subself is what makes me a good Dominant (which is more about attitude and demeanor than the toys): I have been in that submissive position, gone through those same tortures, and so can empathize with and better appreciate what my submissive partner is experiencing.
As a Dominant (or Domme), I'm a sadist. Almost more than anything else, I enjoy inflicting pain on a masochist sub, watching them endure and suffer in their eagerness to please and knowing that it is cathartic for them. Whimpers, grunts, and hisses from the pain are aphrodisiacs to me. Is really is a high to have so much control over a person, to have them trust me so much they'd allow me to restrain them and hurt him, that they'd literally put their body in my hands. How could I not care about and appreciate someone (especially a man) brave enough to be powerless to me? How could I not take care of them? So mixed in with the infliction of pain are reassuring words, tender touches and kisses. I've been told that I'm "merciless but not cruel," and it's obvious that I care. It shouldn't be any other way.
posted by The Author at 5:05 PM with
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