Eau de Man-Stink

In a lot of ways, The Artist is my perfect sexual match: passionate, aggressive, tender, forceful, affectionate. We both have that duality in our sexual nature and successfully feed off eachother, alternating between the kind and the cruel. He loves eating pussy even more than I love sucking cock (which is a lot). We've stood kissing and stroking each other for minutes on end. I've shown up at his place, ripped our clothes off, kissing him so hard our teeth clanged together, and got off all over his face.

My affection for him is totally influenced by the fact that he gave me the biggest, hardest orgasm I've had in years. I'm talkin' uncontrollable screaming, limbs thrashing, muscles clenching so hard I pulled my hamstrings and got a charley horse. God bless that man's mouth.

Mostly it's really rough sex. Me sucking him off while sqeezing his balls and biting his dick; him forcing his cock down my throat and then pinching my nose closed when I start to gag. Riding him with his hands tight around my neck until I see stars. On my back, pounding me so hard he leaves bruises on the inside of my thighs.

For some weird fucking reason, I really like the sweaty, stinking smell of him after sex, and I've actually put my face in his chest hair and armpits to sniff him in. He suggested gagging me with a dirty, sweaty t-shirt of his, and the idea made me dripping wet.

A Glorious Tool

The Vet was bottom and I was top, so the first thing I had him do was strip naked and stand before me so I could inspect and explore his body. I do this for two reasons: because I LOVE the male body and love touching, licking, biting, pinching, and stroking every bit of a man, and to know my partner's body (e.g. color and temperature of hands, feet, limbs, etc) so I can notice any potentially negative changes during strenuous bondage or beatings. The first thing I notice about The Vet is that he has the fattest, most beautiful cock I've ever seen - and it was only half hard. A truly glorious tool. Let me tell you, it was a serious exercise of self-control to explore the rest of his body for over ten minutes before sitting down in front of his crotch.

It was the most fun I've had with a cock in my mouth. He smelled good and tasted good, and his skin was so soft. He filled my mouth so nicely and stretched my lips wide. I spent a lot of time just licking him and rubbing my lips, nose and chin over him. Sucking on him so hard that it pulled his whole body forward. He likes teeth and being bitten during oral, so I got to teasingly scrape my teeth along him and bite down on his shaft, feeling how spongey he was inside. I probably had him in my mouth for over half an hour. He was actually very sweet. Sitting on the futon with my head in his lap, he leaned forward and put his arms around me, his face in my hair, smelling me and moaning.

Later on he returned the favor with his mouth on my cunt. He's the first man to take seriously my warning that my clit is very sensitive and to be careful with it; he started off gently, carefully, and built up the pressure. Then I sat on his face, facing his cock, while he gave me the best rimming ever. I couldn't help but grind down on his mouth. So good I almost came. Still on top, I slide my puss down on him. God, it hurt, stretching me, and it took a couple seconds to adjust. He said, "it's so hot, it's like a furnace."

Afterwards, we laid around for a while and talked religion. Nothing like post-coital intellectual discourse.

Delicate Egos

Men can be overly sensitive when it comes to sex and anything remotely involving their performance. When it comes to their cocks, they are usually either too confident or too fragile. A new lover says "I like it like this," and I do it like that. Yay, a new technique has been added to my repertoire! He's not criticizing my skills as a lover, just sharing what he knows about his body and knows what will get him off.

I tell this guy "please harder" and he wilts. He says I can't make demands of a man like that (uhh... yeah, I can). He's okay taking suggestions when his face is in my pussy, but not when his cock is in play? Fucking annoying. Other men thank me for being so expressive and saying what I want, rather than lying there silently and leaving them guessing. This one loses it at the slightest implication he might not be the world's most perfect fuck. I told him, "Perhaps you'd prefer I just lie there and wait for you to finish so I can roll over and go to sleep?"

Thanks to Mom

Long distance on the phone, Mom asks, "How's it going with that new guy you're seeing?" I pause, trying to remember which one I've told her about. She's not stupid and she has to have figured out there are a few. So she helps me out, "You know, the one who's..."

My mom is awesome. She was always very open about sex and raised me to be safe and aware, not ashamed. In the 1980s, I saw her gay friends sick with AIDS and she was honest with me about the disease (and when she gave birth in the mid-80s, a hospital director laughed at her for insisting on plasma in case of a medical emergency, instead of relying on the blood banks). She's bi, and for a time growing up I had two mommies.

My childhood friends' parents owe my mom a lot. Kids ask each other about sex, not their parents, and thanks to my mom I had the right answers. At 14, I bought condoms for one friend and showed him how to put them on (even though I was still a virgin at the time and he wasn't). I explained about blow jobs and hand jobs and rimming and how you can't tell just by looking at someone if they have an STD. In high school, a lesbian acquitance tried sex with a man and walked away from it stunned and upset; instead of calling any of her close friends, she called me because she knew I wouldn't judge or get angry but listen and take care of her.

Don't think I'm a whore because my mom was so open about sex. Up until four months ago, I'd had sex with only three men in three long-term relationships (granted, two of those relationship were concurrent). I was sexually willing and adventurous, but not promiscuous. Right now, I don't want a steady relationship but do want very frequent sex and my solution is multiple partners. Mom says, "whatever makes you happy, sweetie." It's because of my mom's healthy and open attitude about sex that I've been able to maintain a positive opinion of men (and having sex with them) despite many abuses.

Recently, mom and I were talking about kink and she said, "You know what's kinky? Jeffrey Dahlmer used to drill holes in guy's heads and pour hot water into it. That's some sadism for ya."

Frustrated

The Hippie finally came through as a top. He had me tied up and sobbing last night, and there are still welts on my ass, red marks across my throat, and bruises in the shape of bite-marks on my tits. Some deep-dicking would've ended it perfectly, but that didn't happen. Just my luck: in order to get what I've been missing, I have to miss what I've been getting. What's up with that?

I'm getting a little scared of myself because I'm never completely sated, and I'm not sure exactly what it is that I need. I know that more and more often I'm wanting something soft and sweet and tender and that I have no interest in that from a man, so I want a girlfriend and some serious queening time. Also, I want a really aggressive man. No top or bottom, no roles, just me and him beating the shit out of each other until we're sweaty, drooling, and panting like dogs, then he pins me down, shoves his fist in my mouth, and fucks me bow-legged. Okay people, make it happen. Chop chop.