Thanks to Mom
Long distance on the phone, Mom asks, "How's it going with that new guy you're seeing?" I pause, trying to remember which one I've told her about. She's not stupid and she has to have figured out there are a few. So she helps me out, "You know, the one who's..."
My mom is awesome. She was always very open about sex and raised me to be safe and aware, not ashamed. In the 1980s, I saw her gay friends sick with AIDS and she was honest with me about the disease (and when she gave birth in the mid-80s, a hospital director laughed at her for insisting on plasma in case of a medical emergency, instead of relying on the blood banks). She's bi, and for a time growing up I had two mommies.
My childhood friends' parents owe my mom a lot. Kids ask each other about sex, not their parents, and thanks to my mom I had the right answers. At 14, I bought condoms for one friend and showed him how to put them on (even though I was still a virgin at the time and he wasn't). I explained about blow jobs and hand jobs and rimming and how you can't tell just by looking at someone if they have an STD. In high school, a lesbian acquitance tried sex with a man and walked away from it stunned and upset; instead of calling any of her close friends, she called me because she knew I wouldn't judge or get angry but listen and take care of her.
Don't think I'm a whore because my mom was so open about sex. Up until four months ago, I'd had sex with only three men in three long-term relationships (granted, two of those relationship were concurrent). I was sexually willing and adventurous, but not promiscuous. Right now, I don't want a steady relationship but do want very frequent sex and my solution is multiple partners. Mom says, "whatever makes you happy, sweetie." It's because of my mom's healthy and open attitude about sex that I've been able to maintain a positive opinion of men (and having sex with them) despite many abuses.
Recently, mom and I were talking about kink and she said, "You know what's kinky? Jeffrey Dahlmer used to drill holes in guy's heads and pour hot water into it. That's some sadism for ya."
My mom is awesome. She was always very open about sex and raised me to be safe and aware, not ashamed. In the 1980s, I saw her gay friends sick with AIDS and she was honest with me about the disease (and when she gave birth in the mid-80s, a hospital director laughed at her for insisting on plasma in case of a medical emergency, instead of relying on the blood banks). She's bi, and for a time growing up I had two mommies.
My childhood friends' parents owe my mom a lot. Kids ask each other about sex, not their parents, and thanks to my mom I had the right answers. At 14, I bought condoms for one friend and showed him how to put them on (even though I was still a virgin at the time and he wasn't). I explained about blow jobs and hand jobs and rimming and how you can't tell just by looking at someone if they have an STD. In high school, a lesbian acquitance tried sex with a man and walked away from it stunned and upset; instead of calling any of her close friends, she called me because she knew I wouldn't judge or get angry but listen and take care of her.
Don't think I'm a whore because my mom was so open about sex. Up until four months ago, I'd had sex with only three men in three long-term relationships (granted, two of those relationship were concurrent). I was sexually willing and adventurous, but not promiscuous. Right now, I don't want a steady relationship but do want very frequent sex and my solution is multiple partners. Mom says, "whatever makes you happy, sweetie." It's because of my mom's healthy and open attitude about sex that I've been able to maintain a positive opinion of men (and having sex with them) despite many abuses.
Recently, mom and I were talking about kink and she said, "You know what's kinky? Jeffrey Dahlmer used to drill holes in guy's heads and pour hot water into it. That's some sadism for ya."
Labels: sexuality
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